I am writing a book about Ayahuasca assisted therapy. Technically the first draft is written and the editing process has begun.
Life is funny this way. If you tell me 15 years ago that this is what I am gonna write a book about a psychoactive plant and how it's shifting the mainstream medical paradigm, I would have laughed so hard and would have thought: that's never gonna happen.
I learnt from my experience that words are magical tools and somehow the universe translates 'never' to 'I am gonna do this'. Weird. But still many times I would exclaim for example: I would never go to the Amazon Jungle and boom, fast forward a couple of years and bam here I am in the Jungle. Don't ask me how all this happens. But I am learning to allow this unfolding. It brought me many gifts.
I remember once about 10 years ago I went to see an astrologer and he said that he is looking forward to reading my book one day. I thought I have no idea what I could write about. I didn't feel I have something to say. However throughout the years I received a lot of feedback about how my life is so interesting to others and how sharing my experiences create a positive impact and inspire others.
In a way I always was a writer. I keep a personal journal for many years. It always helped me to write things down, to help me to detach from my own story and see myself more clearly.
I write everything down. I take meticulous notes after each session with my clients and create personal maps of the psyche. I am also very visual, I like to see the context.
I have a monthly planner on my door and what's not written on it, doesn't really exists:)
So you see, I was always writing. For me I think it's a necessity in a way to release tension and harmonize.
But I never really thought of sharing it. It was all so personal and confidential.
I felt too vulnerable sharing it. I wanted to hold back. Keep it only for me. Trying to play safe.
However as a result 7 years dedicated work with this sacred plant transformed me in unexpected ways, starting with a growing urge and desire to share what I came to know to assist others and ease their way.
First I thought it it my desire and intention. It felt like it. Then I became aware that it is her, The Mother working through me and I am just an instrument, doing my best to be a clear vessel and surrender to this process. I feel now that it would be selfish to hold back, not to share. I received so much, and there is a lot more coming. I have to create more space. And of course it brings me so much joy. I am happy to share. This new possibility excites me and ignites my creative passion.
But it's still hard to believe that I I actually have written a book about my deepest and most personal experience about how this relationship with this teacher plant transformed my life and inspired me to assist others in unexpected ways.
It's funny in a delightful way, when you start to see the humor in things instead of being frustrated by it. Her whole teaching is about death and rebirth and of course I am having this 'birthing experience' to bring something out into this world, I feel excited, I feel afraid, I have my doubts but I feel a much deeper need to share with the world to expand myself this way and to be in greater service on a collective scale.
This information presented this way (the book) would have helped me a great deal at the beginning of my journey. And I supported many people by sharing this knowledge.
I believe that presented in a book form it can reach many more people than who I can personally touch and inspire them to heal and to remember the path of love and unity.
I feel that there are pivotal moments when we need to go out and share, start to give back and walk this path of service in order to move forward and expand in new ways. Contribution is part of service.
Sharing is caring. This is so true. By sharing I feel I allow the infinite source move through me and creating more space to receive then share again. When I share I am in space of gratitude because I remember there is always something to share.
Stay tuned. Book is coming soon.