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How to control people? The psychology of control and the abuse of power


The nature of power


Do you feel victimized?

Do you feel powerless?

Do you feel trapped?

Are you scared?


So many people around the world feel this way right now.

Have you ever wondered where your power goes when you feel powerless? Well everything is energy and energy cannot be destroyed. It can be transformed or moved from one place to another. Therefore when you loose your power, somebody gains that.


People who want more and more power have to take it from others it is as simple as that. If you have ever been in an abusive relationship you know how this works. The classic dynamic of power over and power under.


To disempower and to control people, you have to manipulate them to give up their power. To submit voluntarily. This is the only way to gain control over somebody or the many.


From a psychological perspective, this is quite easy to do with simple conditioning through repetition. There are two main ways to effectively condition somebody.

To offer them something they really want/desire like youth, beauty, riches and fame or to threaten them by taking away something they really need to live like safety, food, shelter and connection.


If you don't want to be controlled first you need to understand how control works so you can recognize it and say NO. I hope to shed some light on that with this article.


Our basic wants and needs


Most people want to be happy and be loved. They think that fame, riches and power will bring them love and happiness. They are willing to sacrifice even their own Soul and descend into darkness to get what they desire. The old fairy tale Rumpelstilskin is a good example for that.


Beyond what we want is an even stronger power of what we need in order to live.

Our most basic needs are survival (safety) and reproduction (to propagate species). Our reptilian brain takes care of that. We are programmed to survive above all. It is our outmost priority. No matter how bad the quality of life is.


Now, if you want to control somebody, you simply have to threaten their survival and basic needs like food, water, shelter, health, safety and connection.

When we are threatened our reptilian brain, our instinctual part takes over to ensure survival. When we are threatened we automatically enter into a stress response.

The automatic stress response is fight/flight or freeze.

When you think that there is nothing I can do about this, you believe that it is not possible to fight or run away and you will enter a state of freeze/paralysis.

When you are under continuous stress in your life your nervous system gets heavily wired to a particular stress response.


When you are in this stress response you loose all logic and reason. You are disconnected from your inner voice, your intuition, your internal guidance system. This leads to more fear and confusion.


If you look at victims of constant abuse like domestic violence, you will see that they are in a state of freeze. That’s why it’s hard to understand why the victim let’s the abuse continue to happen. They simply paralyzed, unable to move, run away or stand up for themselves.

At this point they submit to the abuser and allow, enable the abuse to continue.


As you can traumatize and keep abusing a person, you can traumatize and control a nation. For example look at the mainstream media, it is a stress inducing device, 24/7. But you get used to it and eventually you become numb, frozen and resign voluntarily.


When people are in a state of freeze they are simply not aware that they have any other options, it doesn’t occur to them that they can fight back or walk away. Their mind is locked into a survival loop saying obey at all cost to eliminate the threat because you need to survive. Obey and live or rebel and die. This is what they think inside.


If you want to control somebody, you just have to threaten their life, traumatize them enough that they will just about survive but never rebel or break their chains. This way you will harness their power and resources for a long time. And it takes very little power to break somebody this way. Just simple psychology of human behavior.


Gaslighting is another tool to manipulate people and take their power. Being told that what you experience is not real it is not really happening or saying that it is for your own good is part of the abuse and deception.


For me this is kind of fucked up but totally logical and easy to see.

When you control many, you have unlimited power and resources and can control even more in this never ending game.

How to break free


For a victim to break free from domestic abuse, they have to recognize first that they are in a never ending loop. That they are enabling the abuser and allowing the abuse to go on. That the abuser never gonna stop, why would they?


Once we recognize what is really happening and how we are trapped, controlled and deceived we have a choice do do something about it. But how we can take our power back?


The first thing to do is simply say no, I do not consent. This might seem too easy a solution but from an energetic perspective it is a powerful statement. Remember nobody can take your power unless you allow it however unconsciously. So standing in your power of NO you will be able to break out from the trauma response and paralysis. Now new options are available to you. Your mind now is open to new possibilities. Now you can ask for help and connect with your internal guidance beyond reacting.


Your next step is up to you and it can be different in each scenario. But the important thing is that with your NO you broke the prison of fear and started to remember that you too have power and choices to make.


To take a first step of taking your power back and say No to the abusers and controllers click here to read a powerful Declaration of sovereignty.


You are a powerful divine creator being. Take back your power and use it for the highest good of all. Yes, you can. I love you.


Nina Izel @AvatarHealingArts


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